Can there be any thing more feared than Jose Mourinho uttering “Diego Costa’s hamstrings?” That is license for the man to score a quadrillion goals. Poor Aaron Ramsey gets a twinge and is laid out for a month. We’ve been hearing about how frail Diego Costa’s hamstrings for over a month now and on match day they appear to be made of kryptonite, glowing viridian lightsaber, and coiled springlike at hip and knee to execute the perfect kinematics and kinetics for sucker punch goalscoring feats. Mourinho claims his main man is doing nothing in training, his hamstrings bathed in the protective salve of the amniotic fluid of a sperm whale, lolling, basking, on Snapchat with the pro-democracy folks in HK. Meanwhile, his hamstrings have increased the threat levels to red in the Arsenal camp. Basically, he doesn’t have to show up – it’ll be enough if he dresses up as a guido and sits on the bench or mails in a hologram for Arsenal to implode. Mourinho’s perfect Pavlovian ploy.
Actually, it won’t take much for Arsenal to implode. Their problem is not someone else’s anatomy. But at what point does something become a meme? Diego Costa’s Hamstrings is close to one.